Ingredients

– A Boa constrictor digesting an Elephant.

– Baobabs.

– Other assorted characters (see below).

The first thing that goes is your sense of time. Your internal clock. Your circadian rhythm. In the long term, disruption of the circadian rhythm can lead to serious health issues such as chronic fatigue, diabetes, obesity, and clinical depression. This is not our concern- I am at peak physical and mental fitness and my blood sugar is stable. I do almost wish I felt fatigued, chronically, even, as I am a nervous wreck, though I suppose those two things are not mutually exclusive.

In Third Grade, we all hated arithmetic until Mrs. Podolski, with her heavy Polish accent, showed up and briefly cast a numerical spell on us. Mrs. Podolski was a short, stout woman who replaced our regular teacher for two weeks. She wore brilliant floral print dresses and prefaced almost everything she said with, “And now, children.”

“This is Clonazepam, the generic for Klonopin. We’ll start you off on 5mg and you can just take it any time you feel that wave of anxiety coming on.”

Pinocchio had never heard of Klonopin before.

Kelsey was dead now, but it was supposed to be a Christmas surprise.