My youngest is 4 right now and he’s convinced ghosts live in our basement. This isn’t one of those creepy instances where a kid sees a ghost that the adults can’t; he thinks ghosts look like the ones from Pac-Man and confuses them with the lights from passing cars, so I’m pretty sure I’m not dealing with a Sixth Sense deal here.

It’s true: 2020 Halloween will suck, and the world will be poorer for it. Luckily Winslow and Little Winslow have a plan.

I just want to say that, as a person who has had numerous run-ins with vampires, “biting back” is never a good option. Vampires are totally into that kind of thing, so unless you want to start dating a vampire I suggest sticking to the tried-and-true defenses like garlic, religious icons, and Korean pop music.

Winslow used to work for an ad agency a million years ago, but he must be doing some marketing on the side if this fancy dude with his fancy suit thinks Winslow’s still in business.

Well, it’s October. Guess it’s time to start posting weird stuff again.