Anyone can publish a novel these days, but not all novels are created equal. Winslow definitely thinks he has what it takes to be a successful author. Better get Ben’s opinion, first!

A month or so ago I was feeling queasy, and my wife brought home some Gatorade in case I starting throwing up all over the place. Thankfully, I didn’t throw up, but I drank the Gatorade anyway. It claimed to be “Fierce Grape” flavored, but it tasted like regular old docile grape to me.

Hey guys, here’s a tip: When you’re out in public, it’s probably not a good idea to monologue about the kinds of women you find unattractive, especially when you’re grouping women into broad ethnic or national categories. It makes you sound like a racist, insensitive ass. And if I hear about it, I’ll probably make a comic out of it.

Man. This is like I stepped into a time machine and ended up in 2004 or something. I haven’t drawn many strips like this lately: single panel, full color, with a joke that feels like you’ve just walked in as the punchline is being told. That’s all I DID back then, guys! And then I was seduced by the power of multiple panels and multiple jokes and all of that decadent nonsense. But for today, we’re dialing it back. So here’s a Ben & Winslow strip, 2004-style.

For those of you on the other side of the world, IHOP stands for International House of Pancakes. It’s a restaurant that specializes in breakfast, but it’s only truly great because, in many locations, you can order breakfast 24 hours a day. It’s not very international, though, so I don’t want the joke to be lost on you actual internationals.