Pastey the Drunken Sailor. Boy was he. True to his name, a ship did not pass without holding Pastey in a state of ridiculous inebriation. It was common to feel a whip of breeze over one’s head as Pastey swung from ship to ship, determined to be drunken on any and all.

All of you deserve gold stars. Yes, you. And you, too, random person reading this over your neighbor’s shoulder. Gold stars for all!

Food? Water?? Shelter?! Sure you may need these things to survive, but since when has surviving made you cool?

Little Winslow’s been around a while, but that doesn’t mean he knows how to bathe properly. I think it’s only fair for Ben to be a little skeptical.

When you realise your day job isn’t fulfilling OR well paid

Pic label: WELL THIS IS AWKWARD

Pic: Two hot women arriving at a party in the same dress, looking at each other with those sideways-mouth faces, there’ll definitely be something like this out there